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I'm sorry for the excess of apologies
And for all the thoughts that I've indulged
For dealing with the summer full of insecurities
That I only half-divulged

It's not easy living as an irrational being
That's motivated by her fear
But I could stand the poison I feed myself
If it stayed out of your atmosphere

I'm just a little lost, and a little dazed
At having someone that finds me fit
I've never had something this remarkable before
But I doubt I could have held on to it

And though I continue to learn and grow
To the shadow of the girl you deserve
There's still that something deep within
Controlled by assumptions both grand and absurd

And if I seem afraid of losing you
It's not that I don't believe your words
It's because I don't trust myself to keep you,
As is the way with cowards

But even though I'm a living mess,
A bundle of chaos upon your life,
That doesn't change that as long as I'm yours
You will make me feel alright

I know you say you're nothing amazing
Well, darling, neither am I
Maybe the world needs too un-amazing people
To love each other for awhile

So even though I'm scared out of my mind
I'll stay right where you need me
Because if knowing you has been an indication
This is the happiest I'll ever be




These won't be the last crazy things I do
But now you have this to remember that I love you
Full title: Letters from an Insecure Girlfriend
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:iconzarayachan:
zarayachan Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
This struck a chord with me... beautiful writing.
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:iconmushroom-kat:
Mushroom-kat Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I favorited this a long time ago, but now it applies more than ever...every single word...it's kinda spooky. But I really really like this poem, amazing job
Reply
:iconichoosetolookup:
IChooseToLookUp Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you so much! Especially for favoriting and coming back to check it out! Means so much!
Reply
:iconmushroom-kat:
Mushroom-kat Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh it isn't a problem really, you don't have to thank me! You deserve it :)
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:iconmissydiggs:
missydiggs Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
This verse:

'And if I seem afraid of losing you
It's not that I don't believe your words
It's because I don't trust myself to keep you,
As is the way with cowards'

Has the most meaning it me. It's beautiful and captures so many emotions in such perfect words. I love the way you vary the sentence structure and the way you compose it. It creates very strong images and emotions in my mind.
This the first time I've related with a poem so much, I love it.

Thanks for sharing your amazing words and ideas
Tessa x
Reply
:iconichoosetolookup:
IChooseToLookUp Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2011  Student Writer
Thank you so much! I'm so glad you could relate. That's something I take a ton of joy in. <3 Thank you for reading and sharing and commenting and generally being awesome. :D
Reply
:iconsamxsamxsan:
samXsamXsan Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2011
This was beautiful. So sweet.
Reply
:iconichoosetolookup:
IChooseToLookUp Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2011  Student Writer
Thank you! And thank you for reading! :)
Reply
:iconmoonlitemeadows:
MoonliteMeadows Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
beautiful
Reply
:iconichoosetolookup:
IChooseToLookUp Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2011  Student Writer
Thank you so much <3
Reply
:iconforeverwillbenothing:
ForeverWillBeNothing Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2011
Wow, this literally describes exactly what i'm going through,
it's wonderfully written =)
Reply
:iconichoosetolookup:
IChooseToLookUp Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2011  Student Writer
I'm glad you could identify! Thank you for reading! <3
Reply
:iconlunanoctis:
LunaNoctis Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2011   General Artist
This was truly touching and amazing. I know how this feels COMPLETELY. Couple months ago I started dating a really special guy...every day I think to myself that I'm not good enough for him and I'm pretty much waiting for him to dump me. I'm always apologizing and saying weird things because I'm socially awkward, but he doesn't seem to mind any of it. Before him, I was pretty much avoiding dating anyone because I was sure that my low self-esteem would drive them crazy. He changed that whole aspect completely.

That one stanza:

"But even though I'm a living mess,
A bundle of chaos upon your life,
That doesn't change that as long as I'm yours
You will make me feel alright"

Reminds me that if someone loves you for who you are, you should just accept it. There's a reason why the people who care about you love you so much.

I'll probably never fully gain confidence in myself, but being with him is making life a little less terrifying every day.

Thank you for writing this =)
Reply
:iconichoosetolookup:
IChooseToLookUp Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2011  Student Writer
Thank you so much for sharing your story and take on the poem. That really touched my heart. <3 I'm so glad you enjoyed it. Much love! :huggle:
Reply
:iconarchangel4everrrr:
ArchAngel4everrrr Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2011   Writer
I absolutely love this. Amazing!!!
Reply
:iconichoosetolookup:
IChooseToLookUp Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2011  Student Writer
Thank you so much!
Reply
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